UNDER/STANDING

I once watched a kids’ television programme and witnessed the host try to explain to a toddler the meaning of understanding in the best way he knows how. He simply said understanding can never exist if both parties do not come to a compromise. For understanding to prevail one person must remain standing whiles the other agrees to go under. Both can never remain upright or both remain under if they expect understanding to hold.

I thought to myself that was the simplest and best description of an English vocabulary I have ever heard.

We often struggle for our opinions to be considered and voices heard forgetting more often than not that the person standing right next to us is also seeking the same attention. I shout and he shouts louder, both of us voicing out our different opinions. How can we reach a compromise if I am not ready to go under and him stand or vice versa.

It has been proven that in most dialogues, the concerned parties all agree on the end result but the differences remain with the approach in achieving this result. It is these differences that prevent the beautiful results from being achieved.

This morning, I read a note from a woman I love, wandering if her overwhelming schedule will drive me into the arms of another woman. Wandering if her recent mood swings and lack of attention to the man she loves will see her bidding farewell sooner than she imagined.

Well, I am not a sorcerer nor do I possess a crystal ball that allows me to see the future. Tomorrow is infinite and filled with so many different possibilities, so I cannot say with all certainty that all will be well. But I do possess two tools that I believe are more powerful than any sorcerers magic or a soothsayer’s crystal ball. These tools are my love for her and my ability to understand.

She may be overwhelmed in her new life and she may be sidetracked in knowing I exist but what will happen if I flare up and she flares up, then that beautiful end result we all so desperately seek will be lost.

We are different in so many ways and we possess so many different opinions but if I agree to go under when she wishes to remain standing and when she realizes she needs to go under for me to remain upright then we share a bond that can never be broken even when the right woman loves me wrongly.